Control by guilt
We are all controlled by guilt to some degree
How do you feel inside when you feel guilty about something you have or have not done? When someone asks you to do something, you may not want to do it, yet you wrestle with yourself about how to say no and about the white lie you may use as your reason. When something you say is misunderstood and makes someone angry or unhappy, how do you feel?
I know for me all of the above and others are demeaning experiences and I’m sure that like me, everyone finds the experience very unpleasant. So we find ourselves doing things we don’t want to do, trying hard not to upset people and many other things to avoid feeling guilty. Being like this erodes our respect for ourselves and the respect others have for us.
When a society adapts guilt as it’s controlling influence, most of the people within that society at some point, or most likely for most of their life will have experienced the sense of feeling less than they know they truly are. This can make us angry with ourselves and or everyone involved. It is understandable that so many people are carrying around such a huge amount of internal anger. Internal anger is very destructive to us as individuals, our physical bodies and it distorts our interaction with others, which of itself perpetuates and amplifies the anger.
We all develop coping mechanisms for dealing with the experience of feel guilt, usually when very young; this can range from becoming a bully to becoming a victim and the full gamut between. These coping mechanisms are adopted from the people who have the largest impact upon us and adapted to serve our purpose. This also reinforces and perpetuates this heinous cycle.
Sustainable change begins at grass root level within a society.
Many people want change yet feel powerless to create change them selves. This is because so much of our personal liberty appears to have been handed over to various authorities and that is exactly how they want us to feel. The more powerless we feel the less likely we are to strive for change, because we think how can the little that I can do as an individual affect the wider world.
We all have much more of an influence within our society than we realize when we truly take responsibility for the way we are being. When we learn to stop feeling guilty and are mindful to stop using guilt to influence, manipulate and control, we begin the change that so many of us desire. Like the ripple effect on a pond, what we do as individuals will spread much faster and much more affectively than we could imagine.
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